By Roberta Alvarado | OBSERVER Correspondent
Lisa McNair wants you to remember her sister, Denise McNair.
Though their lives never physically crossed, their bond transcends time, circumstance, and the course of U.S. history. Lisa was born nearly a year after Denise was murdered in the 1963 bombing of the 16th Street Baptist Church in Birmingham, Alabama, carried out by the Ku Klux Klan. The attack killed four little girls – Denise, 11, and Cynthia Wesley, Carole Robertson, and Addie Mae Collins, all 14 – and two boys, James Robinson, 16, and Virgil Ware, 13. Twelve-year-old Sarah Collins Rudolph was seriously injured.
On Jan. 26, 158 attendees gathered at Trinity Cathedral in Sacramento to welcome Lisa McNair as an honored guest to share her book, “Dear Denise: Letters to the Sister I Never Knew,” and her family’s story. McNair reflected on her sister’s legacy, how the bombing shaped her family and the civil rights movement, and the ongoing fight for racial justice. She also shared how her family, rooted in faith, chose love over bitterness in the face of unimaginable tragedy.
“They chose love instead of hate,” McNair said, emphasizing her parents’ belief that “there’s good in everybody.”
McNair recalled Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s role in the aftermath of the bombing. He met with the grieving families and delivered a seven-minute eulogy at the funeral for three of the four girls. (The fourth girl’s family had made separate arrangements.) She reflected on her father’s predominantly Black Lutheran church and how its white pastor and his family, the Elwangers, taught her that “not all white people hated us. Not all white people want us dead. Some of them could be our friends and love us.” In fact, it was because of this friendship, and their connection with Mark Carlson, who coordinated the effort for her to speak.
Her book is written as a series of letters to her sister both as a way to connect and as a means for McNair to process her experiences navigating two worlds, Black and white, after such a tragedy. Attending a majority-white Episcopal school as part of the first generation post-segregation, McNair admitted, “I was terrified of going.” But it turned into a wonderful experience, even as it left her feeling like she belonged to neither world.
Attendees Ken and Margie Lee-Johnson found McNair’s talk very moving. They left with a deeper understanding of the magnitude of that day and learned new details of its extent. Margie gravitated to King’s words: “We must substitute courage for caution.” She expressed profound sadness about what our country is going through, noting that withstanding it is about finding that courage. “It’s what I needed to hear – not necessarily what I wanted to hear, but what I think I needed to hear,” she said.
McNair’s powerful storytelling left the audience deeply moved, highlighting the enduring impact of racial injustice and its relevance today. She balances activism with the resilience of love and faith in the face of profound tragedy. McNair reminds us that justice was delayed, and in many ways not fully served, as it took decades to hold the perpetrators accountable: two of the Klansmen were convicted in 1977 and 2001, respectively, and a third in 2002. Her words challenge us to confront the past while inspiring meaningful action in the present.
McNair is available for speaking engagements through SpeakLisa.com, where she continues to honor Denise’s memory by educating others and urging everyone to reflect on how we treat one another and work toward a more just and compassionate world.